Saturday, October 22, 2011

Writing Sympathy Messages for Cards

Having to write a bereavement or sympathy message for a card can be a daunting task and finding the perfect words to write nigh on impossible, as words will never convey the depth of comfort you wish to send to your grieving family or friends during their very difficult time of sorrow.

Unfortunately the loss of a loved one is something that we will all have to endure, and so writing a sympathy card is a task that we will all need to do at some point, so it is a matter of trying to choose the best words to convey a genuine and thoughtful message to the person grieving the loss of their loved one. Try to send the sympathy card as soon as possible after the death.

When writing sympathy messages for cards, the words you pick are very important. It is best not to try to say too much, so keep the message simple and short, particularly if you did not know the person particularly well. A card is not the appropriate medium to inform the recipient of your own news, or to offer an explanation as to why you haven't been in touch for a while.

If the deceased person was well known to you, then you should try to be more personal by conveying what the person meant to you, and how greatly they will be missed.

Here are some common phrases used in sympathy cards: "I am sorry for your loss"; "With deepest sympathy"; "Our thoughts and prayers are with you"; "[Name] will remain in our hearts forever". However it is important to write something in the card that sounds genuine, and not overly clichéd. Avoid using a message that suggests that you know how the family is feeling or that suggest that the deceased may be better off as his or her suffering has ended.

If the person has died after a long term illness it is appropriate to mention this in your message, but avoid mentioning details of the death, as the pain and memories will still be very raw to the recipient.

One must also be careful to observe the correct etiquette in these difficult circumstances. Always neatly handwrite, rather than type, both the sympathy card and the envelope. When signing the message it is also usual to use your surname, even if you know the person well, and use proper titles when addressing the envelope, ie Mr, Mrs, Miss etc. The card should be addressed to the closest person to the deceased, unless you did not know them personally, but you knew another family member - in this case you would address your sympathy card to the person that you know.

If you feel a card is not enough consider sending flowers - any good florist should be able to help you select flowers that are appropriate for the occasion. Often, a charitable donation will be the preferred gift by the family.

The recipient will often follow up the sympathy card with a 'Thank you' card. Remember that the time following the passing of a loved one can be challenging, so remember to keep in touch, or follow up with a 'Thinking of you' card.

If you're looking for suggestions for Sympathy Messages for Cards, take a look at some of the messages listed at http://www.messagesforcards.com

By Simon Spanglehurst

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