Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Overcoming Fear of Public Speaking - Turning Towards Your Audience

In my public speaking coaching workshops as I watch how a nervous speaker at the front of the room relates to their audience, I notice that the speaker nearly always 'turns away' metaphorically (and sometimes literally) from the group. And no wonder! If you're nervous about presenting, it's usual to think of the audience as a separate, even threatening entity - one that's waiting to pounce on you with criticism or challenges. If you have these assumptions, how can you not 'turn away'?

Often this 'turning away' manifests in the sense that the speaker is talking to him-or-herself, there's no connection, no 'reach' towards others in the room. The wall is up.

And there is no neutral; you're never 'on the fence' when it comes to relating to your audience.

Turning towards instead: this is a choice that every speaker has to make, and it's a practical exercise in my workshops. Here are some ideas for you, both in the lead-up to any presentation, and when you're in front of a group:

In the lead-up to your presentation:
    * Consider if you're inclined to mentally push your audience away. If you are, see if you can make it a game to alter this: start by asking yourself, "how can I begin to turn towards my audience?" The very act of asking "how?" will set your mind working to give you answers, and if even this seems too hard, remember that you're only asking how to begin turning towards them: you don't have learn the samba together (plenty of time for that later!)
    * imagine, visualize yourself engaging with audience members - having a conversation, not giving a presentation. A conversation is mutual; giving a presentation is a lot more work on your part. See if you can imagine it more as a give and take: this lifts some of the pressure off you.
    * play around with expanding your energy out beyond your body, to encompass the audience. You could imagine an energy bubble or a balloon, holding both you and your audience in the same space.
    * create deliberate self-talk around building some sort of connection between your and the audience. See if you can come up with a metaphor, like a bridge, or threads of connection. Coming from a more creative background (I'm a trained Classical pianist), I like to imagine webs of light between me and the group - that may be too fanciful for you, but you get the idea. Hey, if you're an engineer, a bridge probably makes more sense!

As you stand in front of the group:
    * do conscious belly breathing, to help bring you into your body, not your head, and become fully 'present' in the room as you prepare to speak.
    * take time to acclimatize yourself before you start to speak. Breathe, and feel your feet solidly grounding you into the earth. It can be a physical shock to your system to suddenly face the audience, if you're not used to it, so be gentle with yourself.
    * how do you usually stand,when you're relating one-on-one, perhaps doing your daily work? Really become aware of this, and then see if you can replicate that posture in front of a group.

Having a 'tame' audience

If you can find a tame audience - where you can explain what you're practising - willing to play the game with you, you're a long way ahead! For them, it involves "bearing witness", in a warm and supportive way, to your shifting emotions and desire to connect with them.

And if you can't access a friendly audience? See if you can find a supportive workshop or course to join, which can really speed up your progress.

Good luck with your next presentation!

Sarah Denholm
http://www.improveyourpublicspeaking.com.au

I'm a public speaking coach, speaker and blogger, and am passionate about helping reluctant public speakers overcome their fears and become comfortable, authoritative and engaging when they speak to groups. It's time to get your message across!

Next Step: visit my website and sign up for my weekly tips, and get your FREE report: 'Are your Subpersonalities Sabotaging your Public Speaking?'


By Sarah Denholm

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